Coffee cups at Breakfast

This post is the detour of all detours so far. First of all because it takes place during my semi-spontaneous trip to Utah. Second of all...because I didn't order an egg white omelet with light cheddar and avocado with my coffee.

That's right, I detoured in my food of choice. And all because of a picture.

You see, I'm a sucker for restaurants that put pictures of items in the columns of the menu. Nine times out of ten my eyes persuade my taste buds that they want what's in the picture.

I'm a pretty usual breakfaster. I mean, I know what I like, and I like knowing that what I get is healthy. Unfortunately, this particular item I glanced at took up the entire front page of the menu. And it looked good! Not the I'll eat it, and love it, and love myself for eating it kind of good; rather, the holy-crickets-this-is-gonna-taste-great-but-go-so-fast-to-my-thighs-that-i'll-walk-out-of-here-like-a-penguin kind.

See what I mean? 

It's from Mimi's Cafe, and it's their new Cinnamon Brioche French Toast. So of course I ordered it.

Since I was having breakfast with my sister before I left to start my drive back to California, we both splurged. She ordered the Blueberry Stuffed French Toast and a Coffee Freeze.

Her drink order was a mystery to me. I quirked my brow at her and sipped my already-arrived coffee--which, by the way, was in the cutest coffee mug!

Please, don't judge! I have a thing for coffee cups/mugs; and I must say that my collection is quite impressive. My mother, however, would say otherwise. When I saw and picked up this cup, though, it had the perfect curve, and it was so simple. Anyway moving on...

I was drinking my coffee when her drink showed up. And then my cute coffee cup and I got a little jealous...

Okay, well...not jealous of that oh-so-attractive brain freeze picture, but we were jealous of the tasty cold beverage in the tall, slender glass.

So of course I ordered one for myself.

It was about this time...maybe five seconds after this picture was taken...that I realized I was beginning to look like a certain high school red-head that I know who once had a picture taken with a rather impressive collection of drinks in front of her.

And then when my sister and I realized that our meals came with another drink, we couldn't help but laugh at the 7 glasses on a table set for 2.

We tried out hardest to finish our beverages, but that cute little coffee mug that I was so impressed with at the get-go got so over-shadowed by it's more exotic relation that...sigh...I didn't finish it. 

And the food? Well, my Nonnie always quotes my great-grandmother when she says, "My eyes are bigger than my stomach." I'd say that this quote definitely applied in this situation. The food went home with my sis one of those classy styrofoam boxes, and we walked--scratch that--waddled out of the restaurant happy, but uncomfortable.

It was a fun and delicious detour, but I think I appreciate my regular little coffee shop and breakfast routine a lot more because I don't waddle out after I eat there. Although I have to say, I wouldn't mind if they started making those coffee freeze things. (Coffee. Freeze. Not frozen coffee. I got laughed at a lot by my sister for that one. I just couldn't remember the name!)

Quick Trip: My New Favorite Place

I’ve been in Utah this past week looking for jobs and apartments. I thought that this would be a great place to move since my sister lives up here. I figured we could live near each other and still feel independent.

The moving plan, however, is a no-go. I’ll be staying in southern California—hopefully with a job. But Utah is definitely at the top of my places to detour to and vacation in the future. 

My roommate from college (who flew out to search for work as well) went with me to explore the windy mountain roads that my parents told me are a must-see!

We drove up to the Sundance Resort and pulled over to take a short walk to see the Bridal Veil Falls. The waterfalls pour down the mountain and look like big white steps that feed into each other until the crashing whiteness turns into more of a steep and shallow river that runs over piles of boulders.

I’ve never seen anything like it. Instead of cascading down into a lake or a pond, the waterfalls feed right into a river.

Since I knew that words wouldn’t be able to explain it as well as seeing it, I took some pictures for you all to enjoy!

It was so pretty walking alongside the river and seeing the waterfalls in the distance.

And we introduced The Shake-Face to Utah!

And because I’m such a die-hard Wikipedier (Wikipedia user), I typed in the Falls and found out that they freeze over in winter!

Maybe I’ll have to check out the skiing here next year and take advantage of seeing how the beauty changes! 

Forget, forgive, and pierce your nose.

I've come to strongly dislike the term "bonding."

Two years ago my younger sister asked if we could "bond," and I ended up sitting in a tattoo and piercing parlor in Pasadena. Because I wasn't a fan of the whole needle, ink, and permanent body art thing, I walked away with a new piercing in my cartilage--this was, of course, after they gave me a juice box and brought my father in to hold my hand (apparently I got too pale).

Lesson learned: Lauren = chicken.

Well, more recently I was asked to go "bond" with the best friend. And I found myself sitting again in the same tattoo and piercing parlor in Pasadena. Instead of losing color, I lost my mind. I would like to say that I passed out momentarily and that's why I forgot about the child I was supposed to watch, but that would be a lie. 

We left for the piercing parlor at 5:30, and I knew that I was supposed to be home by a quarter to 7:00.

A quarter to 7:00. I needed to be back by a quarter to 7:00.

...

One dead phone and a nose piercing later, I asked what time it was and sighed in relief after hearing that it was only 7:05...plenty of time to get back to the house for babysitting at a quarter to 7:00.

I got in my car, looked at the clock: 7:15. I was good; it wasn't a quarter to 7:00.  I had 30 minutes.

I know what you're thinking: Did she make a typo? Does she mean a quarter to 8:00? Or does she not know how to tell time?

Don't worry; I finally realized what I'm sure you've been screaming in your head. 

It went a bit like this:

"It's 7:23; I have until a quarter to 7:00...A QUARTER TO SEVEN!!!! IT'S 7:23! I'M SO F***ING LATE!!"

*Insert ten minutes of screaming profanities*

"I'M A HORRIBLE PERSON! I'M AN AWFUL, AWFUL PERSON!"

*More profanities*

*And again....they basically just continued from here on out...*

"Okay, okay! They were going to dinner with my parents, and I know where they're going. Maybe they just took her with them!"

I tracked them down at dinner....but the child was missing.

GAH!!!! 

They had taken her to someone else's house--someone who was in the middle of making dinner for her fiance. My memory lapse was interrupting multiple dinner dates!

"I'm an awful person!"

I hopped in my car and sped over to get the kid.

"I'm an awful person! I am a horrible, horrible person!"

So I picked up the kid, explained that my forgetfulness was due to a not-so-rebellious-because-my-parents-didn't-really-mind nose ring.

Got the kid in my car and continued to mumble my disappointment in myself.

And then it happened. The kid flipped the mood and made me laugh.

She cut me off mid-rant.

"Miss Lauren!" she said in between bites from her milkshake (I caved and got us something sweet to help turn the bad to good), "You just need to forgive yourself."

"Yeah, but sometimes self-forgiveness is the hardest kind," I said and silently noted how I liked the phrasing of what I'd just told her.

"Not for me," she slurped whipped cream. "I forgive myself for everything; I'm never mad at myself!"

*insert uncontrollable laughter*

Her point: I needed to shut up and get over it. 

Good point.

Lesson learned: I need to thank God more often for the family and friends I have who accept when my life detours take away my brain for the day.

 

My Fictional Friends (NOT imaginary, fictional!)

"Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia." --E. L. Doctorow

I love when people ask me to go hang out with them on the weekends, but to be quite honest I'm somewhat of a homebody--not big on socially drinking (been there, done that, have the scars to prove it!)--so if "going out" involves spending money to get into a club or pay for a drink that I never wanted in the first place, I'm probably gonna say 'no thanks.'

I'm not a recluse, just not big on weekend partying like most other 20-something year olds my age.

And the blessing of being a writer is the joy that comes with solitude because it's when I'm alone that I am able to swing open the gates of my imagination and let my fictional friends live out their lives on the page before me. I'm not a recluse; I promise.

But I realize my lifestyle makes me a bit of an oddball...maybe I'm on the verge of going mentally insane because I am fascinated by lives of my own creation...but to be quite honest I don't really care.

These fictional friends--not imaginary because my hope is that someday I will be able to introduce them to you--don't require that I spend money to visit.

One more thing: This miscellaneous post is brought to you by the fact that I talked with one of my Aunts today about something concerning a July Novel Writing Month (not sure if that's what it's called). Anyway 50,000 words in one month. And even though 2,000 words a day sounds like a terrifying commitment, I'm willing to give it a shot on my own. I'll keep you posted on how my story progresses.

P.S. It's crazy how something I love to do and find so relaxing can also be the source of some major stress. I'm gonna turn this into a challenge...and I'm gonna try my hardest to make sure I don't race to the finish, but delight in the process itself. If my characters take me down a detour, we'll simply have to enjoy the journey together and find a new way to get to the end of our maze.

The Shake-Face

In some of my recent detours from job-hunting, I've been going through my baby pictures and looking at other more current pictures as I map out a strategy for scrapbooking. Let me start off by saying this: any detour that deals with looking through pictures is worth the time taken away from crossing the finish of my job-hunting maze because it makes me happy. Some pictures, however, make me want to cry--some from laughter and others from pain.

I mean, we all have pictures from our past that we hate. Personally, though, I dread the newborn to one-year phase of my not-so-glamorous babyhood. As a newborn I dropped into the world measuring a not-so-petite 10 1/2 lbs and 23 inches long...Oh, did I mention I arrived early? 

Because of these hefty numbers I am convinced that I ate my twin in the womb. Alas, my mother tells me time and time again that, no, it was no last minute pre-birth sibling gorge that resulted in my weighing the poundage of two healthy babes combined; I was, simply put, gargantuan. 

(You see why I stick with the twin theory?

Also, note the left eyebrow...can you say "hottie!")

This burden of being blessed at infancy with John Goodman's good looks, (because, let's be honest, that picture makes me look like him) ruined me. I was forever trying to make myself as adorable as the cute kiddos my age by modeling clothes from my dress-up box, hosting tea parties, and acting out the fairy tales from my imagination. Luckily, at around 2 years old I seemed to outgrow the awkward Sumo-wrestler baby look and, I'm proud to say, became a somewhat adorable little girl.

(See! I really was cute.)

Unfortunately, history has begun to repeat itself, and the pictures you might find of me today might make you question just what happened to all that cuteness I worked so hard to achieve as a kid.

You see, I've recently discovered this glorious thing that I like to call The Shake-Face.

A Shake-Face is simply an ugly--and i mean ugly!--self portrait taken with a digital camera, and all you have to do is shake your face as hard as you possibly can. 

Sounds like a brilliant idea, right?! Bear with me a bit, and you'll see why the Shake-Face is such a hit.

My friend and I were introduced to the Shake-Face on my 22nd birthday.  On the way home from dinner, my brother suggested (to a semi-buzzed me) that I try shaking my face as fast as I could so he could take a picture of it. I agreed because, let's be honest, a buzzed idea is always the best idea at the time of the buzz.

He took the picture, and I was absolutely blown away by the amazing/awfulness of the shot. 

And so, years of childhood hard work at looking somewhat photogenic were put to waste. My goal was no longer to be on the cute side of the how-do-I-look spectrum; I now sought the cringe-worthy end.

This was the beginning of the Shake-Face tradition!! One in which shouts of "We can look uglier!" and "That's not hideous enough!"cause many eyebrows to quirk and parents to wonder at the backwardness of the whole thing.

See for yourself why people wonder...

The Shake-Face @ Overflow (my church's group for high school, college, and young adults):

Responsible leaders hard at work!

(This is why we're best friends.)

The Shake-Face in Arizona on a mission trip with junior high kids:

(We got in trouble that night...

Lesson Learned: Shake-Face does not lull children to sleep. Who would have thought?)

The Shake-Face @ the Junior High All Girls Sleepover:

(After an all-nighter with jr. high girls I don't recommend Shake-Face....

Because. It. Hurts.)

The Shake-Face has been to Disneyland, Jersey Shore night at the best friend's house,  poolside, and church...It's basically become the we're-bored-so-let's-kill-time time-filler, and it has yet to be replaced by anything more giggle-enducing. 

I don't recommend Shake-Face to the self-conscious; however, if you decide to try Shake-Face, there is one important thing you need to remember:

YOU CANNOT LAUGH IN THE MIDDLE OF A SHAKE-FACE!!! 

And I do guarantee you'll be laughing...Also, it's semi-guaranteed that you'll get a headache. It cannot be good for your cranium, but it's definitely good for a laugh. 

Just relax your face, then shake and shoot!

P.S. If you know of any other ways to get-the-giggles and spend zero dollars, I'd love to hear them :D